


縁

by forgetme



Category: Naruto
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-17
Updated: 2017-04-30
Packaged: 2018-10-20 01:57:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10652553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/forgetme/pseuds/forgetme
Summary: "Today’s lesson on chakra is a little different"





	1. Chapter 1

“Today’s lesson on chakra is a little different,“ sensei said in his usual monotone as he picked up a piece of chalk and turned to the blackboard. “I’m sure many of you have already heard about our topic and have been waiting for me to bring it up.”

Gai sat up straighter and craned his neck to see over the spiky ponytail of the Nara boy in front of him. He squinted at the jerky movements of his teacher’s hand, watching them draw big white characters that almost seemed to exude a strange kind of glow.

**Chakra Bond**

Sensei took a step back to admire his work before he turned around and faced the class again.

Meanwhile whispering had broken out and quickly spread from the back to the front rows, the tension in the room so high that even Gai could feel it like ants crawling up and down his limbs. The kids around him were talking – not to him of course since he was still the dead last weirdo – but loudly enough that Gai could hear them.

_Do you think we’re gonna…?_

_Finally?_

_No way…_

_My mum said…_

For a few seconds, sensei waited, his arms folded across his chest. After a minute, he began to tap his foot. When the volume only rose, his eyes narrowed.

Gai’s palms were damp. He squeezed his hands into fists and felt the moist heat of his soaked bandages. Nervously, he glanced over to his rival who sat in the first row, as motionless as ever, the back of his head like that of a statue. 

“Hm, do you not want me to continue? We don’t have to talk about the Bond today. I’m sure we could push it back a few weeks if you’re not ready.” Sensei hadn’t raised his voice, he hadn’t glared or thrown chalk the way he sometimes did, but the effect he achieved was instant and breathtaking. It was as if he had triggered an exploding tag, a collective gasp, then silence.

Everyone’s mouths were clamped shut.  They were all waiting.

A small smile crept across sensei’s face. “Okay,” he said. “We already talked a bit about chakra last week. It is the first topic covered in your first week as students of Konoha’s shinobi academy. You know all about the elemental nature of your chakra.”

A tiny thrill went through Gai as he remembered that day when sensei had handed out those pieces of paper to them all and Gai had found out that he had lightning chakra, just like his rival! He’d kept the crumpled piece of paper, had taken it home to show his papa and then he’d put it in his special box under his bed with all his other treasures.

“Today you’ll learn about a different aspect of your chakra, called the chakra bond.” A diagram of the chakra pathway hung on the wall next to the blackboard. Sensei walked over to it and pointed to the center of the stylized ninja where the light blue lines representing the path chakra travelled through the user’s body curled into a spiral. “You know that chakra flows through your entire body.” He traced one of the lines with his finger, from the stomach up to the figure’s head. “Like your blood, and also like your blood it has a certain type. However, you know that while your chakra has one main element, it is still possible for a skilled ninja to mold chakra of different elements and even combine them for their jutsu.”

Sensei was drifting away from the main point, Gai thought.  He tended to do this, and the class was getting impatient, the children were exchanging annoyed glances, a few of them starting to whisper again.

Sensei cleared his throat.

“What I am trying to get at is, your chakra may be categorized according to its main element – wind, fire, lightning, water or earth – but it is still unique, like a fingerprint. A few weeks from now, you will start learning how to identify shinobi by their chakra signature and how to suppress your own, so the enemy won’t be able to recognize you.”

“There is another thing that is unique about your chakra. It is tied to one other person’s chakra. That’s what’s called the chakra bond. Everyone has it; your chakra is tied to the chakra of one other person. That doesn’t mean that their chakra is like yours, though. It’s more like a lock and key relationship.”

Again the whispers were starting to swell. A girl giggled, then was shushed by another kid. Gai stared hard at the back of his rival’s head. His heart was pounding; his mouth was desert-dry. Was today the day?

“At your age and skill level, you can’t sense your bond yet,” sensei droned on, “but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. Believe me, in a few years, you’ll understand. For now what you have to know is this: your chakra bond is unique. It can only be broken if you or the person who shares the bond with you dies. There aren’t any jutsu that can break or somehow create a chakra bond. Once the bond is broken, it is broken for good. You’ll feel it.”

Like all the other children, Gai was on the edge of his seat, silently begging his sensei to get to the point. They really just wanted to know one thing. _Who is it?!_   _When are you going to tell us?!_

The other stuff, pretty much all of it, they’d already heard. Everyone knew about the bond, even Gai. Shinobi were bonded by their chakra to their one person. That person made you stronger; they were your best friend. By default. And when you were old enough, you got married and had children. That was just how it was. Gai knew that his own parents had shared a chakra bond. His papa had told him how they’d found each other at the academy. They’d been together until the day Gai’s mom had been killed on a mission in the Land of Rivers.

“Today,” all of a sudden sensei’s voice rang out much more powerful than before, “ _today_ , you will learn about your _en_ and the person who shares it with you.”

He marched over to the door, pulling it open with one hand while still addressing the class, “For this purpose, I have invited a few specialists who will help us see the connections between all of you.”

Two women and one man stepped into the classroom, all three of them wearing the standard blue Konoha uniforms with chûnin vests. One of the women smiled at the kids in the first row, but her two colleagues greeted sensei with a curt bow, then stared impassively ahead.

There was some uncomfortable shifting. Gai found himself rubbing the tops of his thighs, his tongue sticking to the roof of his mouth.

The smiling woman stepped forward. She had long brown hair and pale eyes. “This won’t hurt a bit,” she said, “we’ll just need you to follow us into the classroom across the hall. One at a time. Mitokado-sensei will wait here with the rest of you, won’t you, Mitokado-sensei?”

“Of course.” Sensei nodded.

“My name is Hyûga, by the way. And these are Inuzuka-kun and Yamanaka-san. Okay, I’ve got the attendance list right here, so first up Aburame Iroha-chan, please follow me!”

It was startling how little ceremony there was. For a beat, the room was completely still, everyone locked in their own shattered expectations.

“Aburame Iroha,” Hyûga-san repeated, untouched by impatience, her smile unwavering.

All eyes were on Iroha. She was sitting two rows in front of Gai and it took her a couple of seconds of glancing around nervously as though she too was looking for herself, before she finally stood up.

“Yes?”  Iroha’s voice was barely above a whisper and seemed to lose itself in the classroom.

“Come on, Iroha-chan.” Sensei waved her over, “you heard Hyûga-san. Let’s go.”

***

After that everything happened fast. Names were called and children got up and were taken through the door into the hallway and presumably beyond. From where he sat, Gai only saw their backs as they walked stiffly, looking small next to the adult by their side.

Mitokado-sensei leaned against his desk, watching everything with a bored expression on his face and when the children resumed their whispered nervous speculation, he ignored it.

Gai tried to focus on himself. He didn’t really want to listen.

_Who do you think you’ll get?_

_I hope it’s…_

Girls and boys were furtively glancing around, then turning to their neighbors, leaning close to them, entrusting their confessions to their friends’ ears.

With nothing to do but wait for his inevitable turn, Gai let his eyes wander the classroom. When he accidentally locked gaze with Yamanaka Miko, the girl made a show of recoiling as if stung by a bee.

“Ew! That’d be the worst!” she whisper-yelled for the gaggle of girls around her to hear. They giggled.

Sufficiently shamed, Gai lowered his eyes. Tell-tale pressure was building in his chest, making him swallow against the tears that threatened to well up. There’d be more laughter if he cried.  He knew he was no prize. He was still dead last, competition to no one, except maybe Obito-kun whose grades were closest to being as abysmal as Gai’s.  

“Hatake Kakashi!” The man’s voice startled Gai from his thoughts. He looked up in time to see Kakashi already on his feet, walking calmly to the door.

You could almost feel hope rising in the classroom. Silent prayers being sent out, reaching for whatever powers there were to be the chosen one to share a bond with Hatake Kakashi. Gai bit his lip and added his own wish. That Kakashi would get someone weird and silly. A nose-picker, a farter, a bed-wetter. Maybe someone who didn’t wash their hands after bathroom breaks or someone who never brushed their teeth properly. Truth be told, Gai wouldn’t have called any of the girls in his class gross or weird. They were just girls, all different yet not so different somehow and certainly all unified in their complete and utter rejection of him. Which was different, yet not so different from the boys’ complete and utter rejection of him. The methods varied but the results were the same. Tears and anger and sensei yelling at him and banning him to the back row.

Anyway, Gai knew what he needed to happen. The girl he got had to be better than the girl Kakashi got. That was the rival competition now.

He kept waiting, even more impatiently because Kakashi was ahead of him – like he always was – and that was unbearable. Children were called and left. Gai chewed on his lip, scratched his neck under his scarf, kicked his feet against the wooden bench.

After an eternity: “Maito Gai!”

The Hyûga woman had returned and called for him. She was alone – so far none of the other children had returned, which wasn’t exactly encouraging.

Gai walked past Miko-chan’s row, not sparing her a glance. He walked like his rival had walked, in slow measured steps, eyes forward. Because Maito Gai was just as cool as Hatake Kakashi.

***

To his mild surprise, Gai really was taken to the classroom across the hallway. It was kind of dark inside and the air smelled of chalk and dust.

“Okay, we just have to confirm something. This won’t even take a minute.” The Hyûga woman put one hand on his shoulder and hissed “Byakugan”. 

Gai felt a sudden shift inside of him, like a spring coiling. Instinctively, he closed his eyes.

The hand tightened around his shoulder. “Look.”

When he opened his eyes, the room was illuminated by a weak blue flame. Gai gazed down at his hands. The light was emanating from them and the rest of his body. It took him a second to understand that it was his own chakra he was seeing for the first time.

“Wow… How did you do that?”

“It’s a pretty high-level ninjutsu, kid. But look closely. Do you see it?”

He blinked. The blue flame wasn’t bright enough to hurt his eyes, but it still felt strange to focus on it so completely, like looking directly at a skinned knee or into a cut on your hand. You expected it to hurt, and then it did.

Gai swallowed. There really was something there. Red among the blue. Like blood flowing into water, there was a streak of red winding through the blue like smoke.

“That’s your bond. It’ll keep you connected your whole life. See where it goes?”

Gai nodded. His eyes had traced the red thread to the door. The streak had gone beyond where his chakra reached, beyond where he could see.

“Okay, let’s do it then. Come on in!“ the woman sounded incredibly cheerful while Gai felt like he needed something to hold on to. This was the moment, now he’d see the person who was going to be on his team in his quest against his rival! From what his papa had told him, they would be the best friend he would ever have! His most precious person!

The door was pulled open in slow motion. Gai could make out a big shape – an adult – who walked in front of another smaller shape engulfed in the same blue Gai was. Now he could see that the red thread was between him and the other kid, connecting their flames.

Gai willed his pounding heart to slow. He wanted to look cool and self-assured for his new best friend. Whatever had happened between them before this moment would be erased because from now on they would be best friends! Maito Gai would work hard and be the best friend anyone had ever had!

The other child walked closer – something familiar in the way they moved… something kind of irritating. And, then, suddenly, the lights were switched on, and Gai could see clearly who was on the other end of his red chakra.

Silver hair, pale skin, a mask and usually droopy bored eyes for the first time impossibly wide with shock.

“Kakashi?!” Gai stumbled backward as his stomach convulsed.

Kakashi didn’t move. “That’s not a girl,” he said, his voice as inflectionless as ever. “Isn’t it supposed to be a girl?”

“I’d say in about eighty-five percent of cases people are bonded to someone of the opposite sex, but sometimes it’s like this. Your teacher will explain the details later.” Hyûga-san leaned down and patted Kakashi’s hair, which he tolerated with a look in his eyes that clearly seemed to say _I am tolerating this._ “Don’t worry, Kakashi-kun, it’s no biggie and I’m sure this little guy will be a very good friend to you. He looks really fun!”

Kakashi said nothing and finally the man standing next to him sighed, mumbled something that sounded suspiciently like shame - a word Gai was so famailiar with he would have recognized it anywhere -  which earned him a glare from Hyûga-san, and told them it was time to return to class.

***

Gai was in a daze. He had no idea what to do now. How could he be Kakashi’s rival and share a chakra bond with him at the same time? Was that even possible?

Besides, you were supposed to get married to the person who was your bond, you were supposed to have children with them! But that couldn’t happen with Kakashi! It was weird! Once again, Gai realized, he had failed to be normal.

Only this time, somehow, Kakashi had failed too.

 


	2. Chapter 2

“No use trying to sugarcoat it, Hatake-san. I’m afraid your son’s bond is Maito Gai, the weakest student in his year. I’m sorry.”

Sakumo, who had tensed up the moment he’d seen Mitokado-sensei’s gloomy expression, let out a sigh of relief. The teacher’s face and demeanor had made him fear the worst – a broken bond or an outside bond, a lifetime of loneliness and stigma for his son – but now the news wasn’t all that bad, merely not ideal. Gai was a boy, which was not what Sakumo would have hoped for, but he was alive and he was from Konoha. Besides, he was already sort of friends with Kakashi.

“Why apologize? Gai is a healthy child with a lot of potential. I’m sure he’ll be good for my son.” As reactions went, this one was formulaic, Sakumo knew that. Still, he wasn’t shocked. With Gai Kakashi had options.

“Well, he’s not exactly from promising stock…”

Sakumo wrinkled his nose. “A teacher should not speak ill of his students or their parents behind their backs. If you want to criticize them, do it to their faces.”

“Ah, of course. I apologize.” Mitokado had a good pokerface. Sakumo, however, could sense how annoyed he was by the unexpected reprimand.

The teacher steepled his fingers and leaned back in his chair. He gazed pensively at an invisible spot located somewhere behind Sakumo’s head.  “This might be better for Kakashi than I first thought,” he said finally with the unmistakable air of someone trying to ingratiate himself to a man of higher rank. “If Gai remains a genin like his father, he will most likely never see serious battle. He could remain in the village and take low level missions. He would be safe and could support your son and later your son’s family. It’s a shame though that he has no talent for medical ninjutsu…”

_Of course,_ Sakumo thought to himself. Mitokado-sensei was a shortsighted man who had already decided what Gai’s life would be – based on nothing more than entrance exam scores and a week as his teacher. Not that the idea didn’t have some twisted appeal. Losing his wife had been the single most painful experience of Sakumo’s life, and yet he knew instinctively that it was even worse to suffer the death of one’s bond. If there was a way to spare Kakashi such a devastating loss…

But Maito Gai was his own person. He had a right to his own life. While it would have been easy to use his rank and influence to steer Gai into whichever direction he wanted, Sakumo refused to sink to that level. There were those in Konoha who didn’t hesitate to demand custody of their offspring’s bond-mate, who instantly moved the children into their houses and subjected them to special training and education, behavior which Sakumo found appalling.

He didn’t know Maito Dai very well, but he did know that the man cared deeply about his son – it was obvious to anyone who had ever seen the unique father-son duo interact.   

“Thank you for taking the time to inform me,” Sakumo said, signaling the end of the conversation. It was late afternoon already and he was eager to take Kakashi home. All the parents had been called in for the occasion; they’d all known what happened during the second week of their children’s first year at the academy and Sakumo had dreaded the day. Now that the worst was behind him and no catastrophe had come to pass, he wanted nothing more than to be with his child, to see how Kakashi was dealing with the no doubt confusing events of the day.

Mitokado-sensei nodded. “You’re welcome. Thank you for coming in, Hatake-san.”

***

Sakumo left the teacher’s office and almost bumped into a woman bent over in the hallway to comfort her weeping daughter. He nodded an awkward greeting/apology as he sidestepped them, hoping the cause for the girl’s tears was merely the general ickiness of boys, or the ickiness of a specific boy and not death or the potential for treason. Either way, Sakumo knew better than to ask.

Only when he arrived outside and saw Gai on the swing set did it occur to him that the girl might have been crying because of another girl. He sighed and looked around until he spotted Kakashi already at the gate, which also happened to be as far away from Gai as possible without actually having to leave school grounds. Sakumo sighed, waved at Gai and walked over to his son, who greeted him with a simple, “Can we go now?”

 “Yeah.” Sakumo offered his hand and without hesitation Kakashi took it, wrapping his small fingers around Sakumo’s in a way that never failed to make him feel infinitely protective. He glanced back over his shoulder at Gai furiously swinging on the aging swing set, propelling himself higher and higher into the air. As usual the boy seemed to be in a world of his own, competing with some invisible opponent. If he looked at him for too long, Sakumo realized, he wouldn’t be able to shake off the stirrings of fatherly emotions he was starting to feel. “Is Gai not going to get picked up?”

“His dad’s always late. He’s weird.” Kakashi tugged on his hand, urging him to start walking. His voice betrayed no sympathy for Gai and Sakumo had no doubt that Kakashi’s second statement was his economic way of insulting both father and son at the same time.

“Maybe we should invite them over for dinner sometime…” he mused.  Kakashi glared up at him. “Or not,” Sakumo amended.

“You didn’t tell me it could be a boy,” Kakashi said after they had walked in silence for a couple of minutes. There was only a hint of accusation in his tone. It was all in his dark eyes.

“Sorry. It never occurred to me.” It hadn’t, not while he’d been silently fretting about this day, wondering if history would repeat itself with his son. If Kakashi too would experience only emptiness, the sense that he was forever missing a part of himself. Decades ago, on a day not unlike this one, Sakumo had seen his own blue chakra flame and within it a frayed spot of red, almost invisible, going nowhere. He’d carried that emptiness within him all his life.

“Am I going to have to marry Gai? He’s really annoying.”

“No, you can’t get married to another boy. The two of you will just be best friends from now on.”

“But you got married to mom.”

“Yes, I did. Because she was a girl.”

“Did you become best friends when they showed you?”

Sakumo averted his eyes. He wasn’t lying exactly, he told himself. He was just not correcting Kakashi’s assumptions.

“No, we couldn’t stand each other for years. I told you, your mom thought I was a boring teacher’s pet. She always played pranks on me. We only started to get along after I was made jônin.” It had taken a long time for them to overcome their prejudices and to realize that they didn’t have to grieve alone.

“Hm.” Kakashi looked down at his feet. They were almost home now, but for some reason he was slowing down. “Am I going to have to do dirty things with Gai?”

Sakumo’s breath caught in his throat, making him cough and sputter. “What?!”

“I read—“

Oh God, not another book incident. Sakumo was not ready for this. His son was five! He was supposed to have years until he had to start worrying about puberty! “Kakashi! You shouldn’t—You’re too young to even think about— We can talk about this when you’re older. And I don’t want you reading those kinds of books!“

Under his mask, Kakashi was pouting, that much was obvious. “It was about the chakra system. I got it from the library. And it said that the chakra bond influences sexual—“

“Kakashi! Stop! We’re not having this conversation now!” And especially not in the middle of the street. Sakumo started walking faster, hoping to distract his son from whatever strange idea he had gotten into his head.

“Why? I know where babies come from, Dad. I read—“

“Kakashi, please!” A few more steps, dragging his huffing son behind him, then Sakumo stopped dead in his tracks. This was not good parenting, he realized, Kakashi had asked him in good faith – he’d sounded worried - and if Nori was here now, she’d be very disappointed.  He chose to ignore the other pedestrians and went down on one knee in front of Kakashi, putting his hands on the kid’s shoulders. “Kakashi, listen, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do, okay? Not with Gai or anyone.” Kakashi nodded slowly.  “Gai hasn’t said or done anything, has he?” No quicker way for the paternal feelings for the other boy to evaporate than to think of him pressuring Kakashi into anything. Although that really wasn’t the impression Sakumo had of Gai.

“No,” Kakashi rolled his eyes, “he just wants to challenge me to fights all the time. And races and hide and seek and stuff like that. It’s pretty stupid.”

So Sakumo had been right in his assessment of Gai. That was a relief. “Sounds like he really wants to be your friend.”

“He’s super weak, Dad. He can’t even do a simple henge. It’s kind of pathetic. Even _Obito_ can beat him.”

Sakumo straightened and dusted off his pants. Then he took Kakashi’s hand again and started leading him down the road towards their house.

“Give him time. He might surprise you yet.” He glanced up at the distant sunset and grinned to himself. “After all, his name is _Might_ Gai.”

Kakashi groaned. “Seriously, Dad? That was so lame.”


	3. Chapter 3

“I have to say it, Dai, your kid has more luck than anything else. Hatake Kakashi? Talk about opposites attracting.” Mitokado-sensei’s smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. Dai smiled back anyway, he had been late, after all, and it was the least he could do to make up for his tardiness. Besides, this was good news, wasn’t it?

“Well,” The teacher continued briskly, “from now on, Gai should focus on supporting Kakashi. That’d be all. Take care.”

Dai blinked in confusion. That was it? That was all Gai’s teacher had to say on this important day of his son’s life?

“Thank you, but—“

Mitokado-sensei frowned. “You can go now, Dai,” he said, cutting off any further discussion.

***

“So, it’s Kakashi-kun, huh?! That’s great, isn’t it! Not only are you eternal rivals, you also share the most precious bond two shinobi can share! You’ll definitely grow strong together! Aren’t you happy, son?!” Gai didn’t look happy and the less happy he looked the more Dai tried to compensate by speaking more loudly and more enthusiastically.

Gai sat on the swing, but he wasn’t swinging, just kicking the dirt and staring at his feet.

Dai lightly put a hand on Gai’s back. “Should I push you?”

“No.”

“Should we go home then?”

Gai nodded and slid off the swing.

In moments like this one when Gai walked with his head hanging, shoulders slumped, feet leaden, he was so much like his mother that it hurt. She’d always carried the weight of them. On the day their bond was revealed to them, she hated him. He’d seen it in her eyes. But she’d worked hard, every minute of every day, she’d worked hard to love him and he’d worked hard too, to be the best he could be for her. Just like he worked hard now to be the best he could be for _him._   

“Was there someone else you liked in your class?” Dai asked.

Gai shook his head. They continued walking in silence. Dai was about to say something about the beauty of the lavender sky when suddenly Gai piped up next to him.

“When you’re a boy and your bond is also with a boy, that’s weird, right?”

“Hm?” _Aha, so that’s what’s bothering him,_ Dai thought, and made a show of scratching his beard as though in deep thought before declaring his conclusion. “No, that’s not weird at all!”

“But the woman said that almost all boys have their chakra bond with a girl.”

Dai had no idea who the woman was but knew better than to ask. It wasn’t important anyway; the only thing that mattered now was to make Gai feel better.

“So? That doesn’t mean it’s weird; that just means it’s rare! Which is not the same thing at all, Gai! Because,” he raised his index finger the way he always did when there was an important piece of wisdom to impart, “when something is rare, that means it’s special! Like diamonds! They are extremely rare, but if you found a diamond would say ʻhey, what am I supposed to do with this weird stone?ʼ and throw it away? No! Because rare things are precious! Your bond with Kakashi is like that; it’s rare and beautiful like a diamond! And it will never break!”

“But it’s not like yours and mama’s.”

“That’s because everyone’s bond is different. They’re all important, though.”

Gai was looking up at him, his adorable face scrunched up with doubt. “But Kakashi doesn’t even like me…” he said.

At this point it was just too much. Dai couldn’t stand it anymore! He turned around and, in one fluid motion, whisked his son up in the air and onto his shoulders. Startled, Gai let out a choked little gasp but instinctively held on, his thighs clamping around Dai’s neck. “Papa! I’m too big for this!”

 Dai ignored his protests – like his son would ever be too big for him! – “Gai, the Springtime of your life has only just begun!” he declared. “You and Kakashi are like small flower buds; there is so much growing you still have to do. If Kakashi doesn’t like you, it’s only because he doesn’t really know you yet!”

Gai tugged on his hair and Dai tipped his head back to look at his son, framed by the beautiful evening sky.

“You really think so, Papa?”

“I know so!” Nothing came easier to him than this reply because how could anyone not love Gai, the sweetest boy in the whole world? And there it was, his reward, his son’s smile, a little hesitant and unsure still, but brighter than all the stars in the sky.

***

It was only later that night when Gai was curled up in bed that Dai felt the first stirrings of doubt in his treacherous heart. He stroked his sleeping son’s back and tried to stay in the present. But the past wouldn’t rest and memories wouldn’t be held at bay.

In moments like this he missed Ren more than anything. Not that he didn’t miss her in all other moments too, just, sometimes, whenever he felt especially weak, he conjured up her image. He imagined her by his side right now, sitting on the other side of Gai’s bed, cupping their son’s cheek and smiling at him.

She’d been so serious, such a worrywart. She would have paced up and down the hallway for hours, but then after she’d done enough worrying for the both of them, she’d stop and come to him and tell him the plan she’d come up with.

“It’s gonna be okay,” she’d say, “Here’s what we’ll do!”

Sometimes when he closed his eyes, he could still hear her voice.

_So they didn’t let you take the chuunin exam this year, who cares! As a genin you’ll have more time to take care of the baby when it comes and I can return to active duty sooner! I’ll make jounin in no time and you’ll be the best papa in the whole world! We’re a great team!_

Where her feet touched the ground, flowers bloomed, invisible to everyone but him.

Would Gai have such strength and beauty in his life? Would he have a wife and children?

Bonds between people of the same sex were supposed to be different, after all. Back at the academy, Dai and his classmates had been taught that having a same-sex bond wasn’t bad as long as you understood what it meant.

“Friendship,” sensei had said, “Lifelong loyalty between two families. Don’t worry, you will get married and have children too. You will find someone who lost their bond or who shares your fate and who will need you by their side. And in addition to a spouse you will also have a comrade who will always be by your side.”

It had made sense and it had sounded like a good deal to his six year old self – he’d even been a little jealous that his bond was with a girl – a girl who didn’t even like him, who stuck her tongue out at him and punched his arm – and not with another boy who, without a doubt, would have been his first real friend.

For someone who had a ʻnormalʼ chakra bond – even though he was considered a weirdo in every other way  - it was impossible to understand what it was like. You were not supposed to think about it. The more or less unspoken rule was that if you a had a ʻnormalʼ bond, you married your bonded person as soon as both of you were of age, and then you had children. Those who shared a bond with a person of the same sex were expected to get married as well, to someone of the opposite sex who had either lost their bond or also had a same-sex bond.  

All of this had seemed right to him until the day Ren burst into his tiny apartment, weeping.   

Barely able to speak, she’d finally pressed out, “They found Sanwa-chan and Semi-chan. Dead. In the lake. They just…”

Dai remembered this strange version of shock, all horror but very little surprise.

The two girls from their class had been inseparable even before they’d learned of their bond. They were both quiet and studious and Dai often saw them in the library, sitting next to each other, shoulders pressed together, noses buried in the same book. While Dai had to study for the make-up tests he had to take whenever he failed another exam, the girls would be whispering to each other, their knees touching under the table.

Uchiha Sanwa and Hyûga Semi had been friends with Ren since childhood, though not with Dai, who only knew them from class and from seeing them around the village. The two of them made chûnin the same year Ren did when they were just ten years old.     

Unlike Ren, however, they belonged to two of Konoha’s most powerful clans.

So it did not come as a surprise when Sanwa’s parents arranged a marriage for their daughter to ensure the continuation of their line. Sooner or later, the same would have happened to Semi.

They were sixteen years old when they tied their wrist and ankles together and went into the lake.

Later, the Hyûga blamed the Uchiha, not for the arranged marriage itself but for the timing of the thing.  Had they waited a few more years, until the girl was out of her teens and more mature, they claimed, the tragedy could have been prevented. What a shame it was that such a sensible and talented kunoichi of their clan had been dragged to her doom by a volatile and impulsive Uchiha, that was how the Hyûga talked about what had happened.

Still somewhat lost in thought, Dai tugged the blanket up over Gai’s shoulder. Ren was on his mind again as she always was.

That day, she’d cried in his arms. She’d let him hold her for the first time.   

***

In their last moments together, they’d stood outside their building. The sky had been clear, cloudless, red leaves dancing in the powerful wind. Dai had nine-months-old Gai bundled up against his chest in a thick blanket. Ren was in uniform, heavy backpack slung over her shoulder, nunchaku dangling on her hip. She’d stood on her tiptoes to kiss him and Dai had stooped at the same time; they’d bumped noses and laughed and then kissed properly. Gai had pulled a strand of hair from her ponytail and tried to put it in his mouth.

“You’ll hold down the fort while I’m gone, right?”

“Of course!

“Wait for me,” she whispered in his ear.

“Always,” he whispered back.

Then she brushed her lips across Gai’s forehead and turned to leave.

Dai waved goodbye until the blue of her uniform had melted into the horizon.

***

“Always,” he whispered now and brushed his lips across Gai’s forehead, tears brimming in his eyes. It took a lot to keep himself from wondering what their last moment together might have been like, out there at the lake.


End file.
